For all of you who have been following the Saga of Raiford Starke (http://RaifordStarke.com) and his pending free concert this January 3rd, 2014, at Your Big Picture Café (http://YourBigPictureCafe.com), all four parts are now presented here for you to enjoy in stereophonic-technicolor-panavision.
THE SAGA OF RAIFORD STARKE, PARTS I – IV
PART 1 – The Inside Scoop On Raiford Starke
Well folks, it finally happened. The United States Music Marshals finally caught up with South Florida’s Premier Outlaw Musician, Raiford Starke. Rumor has it that Raiford was nabbed while out with Tom Wait’s Gun Street Girl walking their pet panthers and pythons somewhere out in the Everglades.
As I write this, federal agents have reported that Raiford is now being secretly transported back to the wilds of far west Broward where he will be held under lock and key at an unnamed location until his “Jury, Judge and Trial Concert” on January 3rd at Your Big Picture Café in Davie, Florida. Rumor has it that hanging judge Dr. Bob and his Music Land Band will be presiding over the proceedings.
So come face the music with Raiford Starke when he performs live and free in concert this January 3rd at Your Big Picture Café.
PART II – The Escapee’s Ball
Well folks, wouldn’t you know it. That darn tootin’ rascal Raiford Starke has escaped from the secret federal music conservatory in far western Broward where he was being held by United States Music Marshals pending his upcoming “Judge, Jury and Trial” concert on January 3rd at Your Big Picture Café.
Seems that while in the poky last night, ol’ Raiford – pretending to have cracked under relentless interrogation – was right in the middle of giving his confessional music recital to the authorities when he unexpectedly played a Dm7sus9 which temporarily sent the Music Marshals into a state of unanticipated confusion and panic, during which ol’ Raiford just got up and walked out.
But don’t y’all panic now and go busting out your 12 string blunderbusses. Hanging judge Dr. Bob and his Music Land Band posse are hot on the trail of this acoustic desperado, and they’ve vowed to bring him in to face the music (and play some too!) at the “Escapee’s Ball” one week from today on January 3rd at Your Big Picture Café.
So come on down for musical jury duty and maybe a drink or two as Raiford does justice to the music he plays so well and is so good that is should be illegal!
PART III – The Hangman’s Ho-Down
Well folks, I am pleased to announce that that ornery, guitar slinging, outlaw musician Raiford Starke was finally captured last night by hanging judge Dr. Bob and his Music Land Band posse. They caught up with ol’ Raiford up at the old O.K. Chorale Music and General Feed Store off in the far wiles of the Black Hills of western Broward.
Let it be known that this was no peaceful surrender by the acoustic desperado. Once he came eye-to-eye with the posse, sharps and flats were flying everywhere and rumor has it that Dr. Bob himself took a G cleft to the left shoulder. In the end, however, musical justice prevailed and Raiford is once again back in the secret Music Marshals’ conservatory somewhere in the low lands of west Broward.
So saddle up your horses and get your dancin’ boots on as Raiford Starke (http://RaifordStarke.com) kicks off the Hangman’s Ho-Down this coming Friday, January 3rd, from 8pm to 11pm at Your Big Picture Café (4900 S. University Drive, Davie, FL).
And remember, there’s free parking, free admission, free music and Great Times!
PART IV – National Pardon Party Day
Well I’ll be darn gosh doggled. Who’d a thunk it possible? Seems the second time was a charm for ol’ Raiford as he sat in his locked recital cell at the Federal Music Marshal’s secret musical conservatory-turned-penitentiary in the far reaches of the murky bayous of western Broward. While the rest of us had given up all hope, ol’ Raiford had one dag-nabbit who-doggy of a wild card hid up his sleeve, yes sir-ee Bob. Or, maybe that should be yes sir-ee Dr. Bob. For after just a few words betwixt ol’ Raiford and his jailors, he was a free man. Cause guess what? Turns out ol’ Raiford and hanging judge Dr. Bob are twins separated at birth!
Now I swears on my old mammies bible that this is the dog gone truth. Seems Raiford and Dr. Bob were born on the same day from the same manuscript. But sadly, shortly thereafter, the whole family joined the doomed wagon train of 1965 that headed off into the wild Amazon Valleys of western Broward, never to be heard of again. Musical missionaries blazing out to bring folk song to the Catskillites – untamed, wild, natives who had migrated here hundreds of years ago to retire from that mythical, frozen northern region known as the Borsch Belt – it is said that they met an unspeakable fate over a declined credit card at the long-gone but not forgotten “Larry’s All Night Delicatessen and Wagon Train Rest Stop.” Abandoned with no parents to look after ‘em in those fearsome, factory outlet mall laden valleys, ol’ Raiford it ends up was raised by alligators, while Dr. Bob was raised by… well, we ain’t exactly sure what he was raised by, but we’ll get back to you on that one as soon as we figure it out.
Well, raucous revelations, let me tell you that news of this traveled fast to the hanging judge himself who instantly issued a decree that January 3rd be declared National Pardon Party Day, and then he ordered that his long lost twin be immediately released.
So come on down to celebrate National Pardon Party Day, this January 3rd, at Your Big Picture Café with that outlaw guitar slinger Raiford Starke, his long lost musical twin, hanging judge Dr. Bob, and the entire Music Land Band posse.
For more info, send a telegraph message to Dr. Bob at 786-262-5750.
THE END (at least until January 3rd!)
PS – this free event is part of the Dr. Bob’s Music Land concert series held on the first Friday of every month at Your Big Picture Cafe in Davie, FL.